The Opposite of Nostalgia

You are running away from everyone
who loves you,
from your family,
from old lovers, from friends.
 
They run after you with accumulations
of a former life, copper earrings,
plates of noodles, banners
of many lost revolutions.
 
You love to say the trees are naked now
because it never happens
in your country. This is a mystery
from which you will never
 
recover. And yes, the trees are naked now,
everything that still breathes in them
lies silent and stark
and waiting. You love October most
 
of all, how there is no word
for so much splendor.
This, too, is a source
of consolation. Between you and memory
 
everything is water. Names of the dead,
or saints, or history.
There is a realm in which
—no, forget it,
 
it’s still too early to make anyone understand.
A man drives a stake
through his own heart
and afterwards the opposite of nostalgia
 
begins to make sense: he stops raking the leaves
and the leaves take over
and again he has learned
to let go.
 

Copyright Credit: Eric Gamalinda, "The Opposite of Nostalgia" from Zero Gravity.  Copyright © 1999 by Eric Gamalinda.  Reprinted by permission of Alice James Books, www.alicejamesbooks.org.
Source: Zero Gravity (Alice James Books, 1999)