Lake Space

By Lauren Shapiro





When the note had been found
When I was running blindly through the marsh
I asked anyone anyone if they had seen your body
walking if they had seen a moving body
that looked like you
somewhere near the water's edge I said
excuse me sir excuse me ma'am I said
by any chance have you seen I said
the December muck from the marsh now through my shoes
and up my leg I said something that felt
a thousand miles from my balloon heart
what I said exactly I can't even
my body felt the futility but said it anyway
my body ran and ran until I couldn't
until there was no one left to ask no one
to see no place for a body that hadn't been
no place at all until my body couldn't catch
its breath felt like it couldn't stop until
my body felt and knew it couldn't








so he was found
so he was committed
so they let him out
you are cured, they said
and sent him out
to where sunlight is an oppressive brick
and the people are mechanized
and happy just beetling around
to where life is a clump of dirt nestled in the bone
of a tree where a dog likes to shit
and each step takes you to the same plateau
and after that plateau there is another
and another just like it
this is the world, they say
this is the start, they say
congratulations, they say



                                                                                   then








How will
you tell
me how
will you
tell me
how tell
will you
tell me how
will you
how will
you were
you even
going to

there was a girl by the lake
she was walking a dog down
their usual path when
they came upon the space

uninhabited, the stranger gone
the dog took a sip of cold
water as his nature asked
in the space where there could
have been a body
a vacuum in the space that
was itself bright and cold
good for the lungs
if you aren't in despair
maybe if you want to
hum or even sing






I wanted a song
more than anything
I wanted a song that comes
full circle with an end that explains
the beginning and a beginning that erupts
out of the deep body

I wanted a chorus to relay the message
again and again, simply, and for
the many crows to provide
the only drama as they leave
the barren tree

I wanted the song to be sung
to the barren tree
and for the silence
of the tree to be meaningful

I wanted the answer to the destruction
of the body by the body, the body that
made me to be found in the tree
and in the song to the tree

more than anything

I wanted a song
Copyright Credit: Lauren Shapiro, "Lake Space" from Arena.  Copyright © 2020 by Lauren Shapiro.  Reprinted by permission of Cleveland State University Press Poetry Center.
Source: Arena (Cleveland State University Press, 2020)