This is Your Chance

English Composition at South Middlesex Correctional Center.

Julie reads out loud, and I praise her super thesis, then show

how her paragraphs veer away from it, just summarize.

And is she pissed! Too pissed to listen when her classmates try

to help. Amanda offers Act 2 Scene 1—"Now I do love her

too"—as evidence of Iago's state of mind. But Julie's

shutting down, frowning at her handwritten draft, writing

that took her weeks. Hey Julie, I say. Julie doesn't look up.

Says What. Says I hate this stupid paper now. So I say

Hey Julie. Amanda's helping you—write down

what she's saying. She says I'm aggravated. I think

they take classes on naming their feelings. I say I know it

but you need to pull it together, or you'll end up screwing

yourself. This is your chance. We're all quiet, breathing

together, willing her to break out of this. Then:

a little miracle. I look around the room and see

that everyone is beautiful. Each did something special

with her hair. Hey, I say, again. I say hey a lot in prison.

Hey wait a minute. What's up with everybody's hair?

Mabel got a haircut. Ellie's hair is long and black and gleaming

down her back, Amanda's in French braids. Julie's freshly

blonde, down to the roots. You guys all look great!

They laugh. They're happy I noticed.

Thank god I noticed; now, for a minute, we

are women in a room, talking about their hair. Julie says

Amanda did her highlights, and Sandy blew it out. Good job, guys;

she looks great. And then I say, Julie. Look at you

all pissed off over your paper when you're so lucky!

Look at all these good friends you have. Helping

with your paper, doing your hair . . . She nods.

She looks me in the eye, back with us, back on track.

I know, she says. I need to work on my gratitude.

Source: Where You Live (Salt Publishing, 2012)