And the Word for Moonlight Is My Name
Hello.
Chandini.
This mouth is a wound from where I’m learning
how to love. My love language, I’ve told strange men, is words
of affirmation. In naked brag of my American tongue—
how does it taste to love with this Indian body? I knew love being breastfed
through a nightstorm where the blued song of electricity ended.
My reparation tools for the cosmos are as precise
as they are approximate. I parse each numerical line
about starshine that arrives in tallies. Chandini, I’ve been
the type of Western methods coward who doesn’t listen
to my stomach’s knowledge. I’ve taken feverous temperatures
with my hands, then gently slapped the trust
of the thermometer on my knee and into a baby’s mouth
again. I don’t trust the way
my nails are embedded with spiraled rinds of sweet oranges
always seeking the reach of knives.
Tell me the way
the Bengal smells, a sweet perfume
that does not exist in a glass on my bedside table.
Tell me again the way we could have known
how half-gods carrying pipes with cloven hooves
sang in key to the slunk ring of rickshaws—
the exhaust settled in laundry lines like blackbirds.
How to say my own name with the certainty of a dove
that trusts the buoying ark of humanity. My bird ring
that waits and slides on the tattoo of a birdcage on my fingers.
Tell me again the way, Chandini.
How divinity was without border control
and conversing with the sky was common as rain.
Ma used to preserve each of her calling cards in a glass
vase as if they could blossom, as if they were the umbilical
rope tethering cosmonauts to the space station.
I was given electric lines of your uncut hair,
like an old telephone line operator—
where can I connect it to but just myself?
Hello.
Chandini.
I’ve held your hair with the softness of space people
washing each other bare in zero gravity.
Long-distance, on the other side, I’ll be there,
a voyager grounded after cosmic exile.
My breath on the line
just praying against echos.
Hello.
Chandini.
Salam.
Hello,
again.
Source: Poetry (September 2021)