Jonestown Death Tape: Part I

I have loved you, how very much

The world did not begin with light but began

with this commandment—

No man takes my life from me, I lay my life down.

If you look closely enough, you can find God

of my face, holiness drowned in mass, a vat

of muscadine bittered by cyanide. For this is one

of the many tricks of faith—how to translate violence

into the rite of passage; bend shadows posed as overseer,

unkept, grief, & pistol into reeds of worshiping

hands. You see, I have lived in hope too long, so much,

there is no longer a distinction. If  I can’t live

in peace then I must die in paradise

more than the syringe can hold. Plunged into the part

of a world that refuses to call me by my name.

When all is said and done, there will be no difference between I,

the father, who gave you a second chance, beautiful & blood-close

& the powder keg you believed you narrowly escaped.