LeaveTaking

I was sitting at home with my daughter          who was young again

           a child with a child’s wish to do things over and over

                   so when she named an old film even I liked

we popped in the disc and sat back to watch

           until daughter and living room faded        that is

                   I kept watching          but the movie              began to dream

I became a stranger set down on Earth

           in the late twentieth century

                   at a pool in midsummer

everyone with towels slung over their shoulders

           children splashing each other          cackling

                   as they kicked the blue water

Beyond this activity a field stretched green           until it reached an end

           and began to climb                 gently sloping skyward

                   like a runway to heaven

I was waiting        I knew they were coming          over the hill

           I knew the moment I stepped out      onto the grass

                                    I too     would disappear

What a curious sensation         being the stranger

           If I thought about it too long

                   I would be seen for what I was

but try too hard to blend in         I might forget myself

           and miss my pickup

                   and be stranded forever

Oh I liked humans well enough         although they were immature

           the old ones dreaming     the same dreams to the end

                   the young ones trying to forget         they were headed there too

always fretting over their bodies         working out    cursing and cooing

          Yes I was homesick                I walked toward the slope

                   towel draped around my neck like a human

but not thinking of humanity         not fitting in         I heard

           something                      a gasp              and glanced back

                   at a child in a shiny pink suit                   who stood staring

nudging her mother as she pointed my way    no I thought not now

           I could feel them          I whipped my towel in the air

                   as if snapping at gnats                 but kept walking

and then the dune buggy puttered over the hill

           just like in the movies              and just like anyone might

                   I stepped onto the grass

suddenly all the humans were staring

           at me or maybe            the idea of us

                   before I was zipped up               and we were lifting

into the universe                 pouring into our true shapes

                         Translucence         then

                                     nothing at all