Changeling

Standing in front of a mirror, my mother tells me she is ugly

says the medication is making her fat. I laugh & walk her

back to the bed. My mother tells me she is ugly in the same voice

she used to say no woman could love you & I watch her

pull at her body & it is mine. My heavy breast.

My disappointing shape. She asks for a bowl of plain broth

& it becomes the cup of vinegar she would pour down my throat.

Everyday after school, I would kneel before her.

I would remove my clothes & ask her to mark the progress.

It’s important that I mention, I truly wanted to be beautiful

for her. In my dreams I am thin & if not thin, something better.

I tell my mother she is still beautiful & she laughs. The room fills

with flies. They gather in the shape of a small boy. They lead her

back to the mirror, but my reflection is still there.