Eelish

Stricken, seen, satellite at the edge of a party,
being fifteen, with the black bulbs someone’s planted
in the mother’s lamps to give glow-in-the-dark
ambiance to hideous kisses, and the ruffles
are all wrong on the saved-for shirt, and the curtains,
suave in the murk, seem to laugh. The liquidy
fin of feeling is destination-less, twisting
like paper wrapped ’round a pinkie
in blind date anticipation. Toy for
the psyche, phrase to swim through the mind
like an offense, at 3 AM.
Half-helix, as if waiting for, Oh God, don’t
say it, a soul mate. What sheathes the stealth
bomber has something of its skin. Pastiche of pluck
and terror, nerve faltering halfway. Opposite
of starlight, stagnant brook that drowned Ophelia, JPEG
from a former colleague, on holiday, landed in spam,
looking older and captioned, Well, here I am.

Source: Poetry (May 2019)